confession

you built in me fear

when others were teaching power

you spent my years in convincing yourself

you wasted my time by not spending yours

you made me depend on you

so you could feel independent

and while i was suppose to learn to love

you taught me how to scheme

when you were meant to teach me to look at myself

you taught me to look at you

.

give me back my learning years

give me back my lost time

the knowledge i never got

give me the sense of love i need

to mend my life

give me the strength i was suppose to already have

to move on further

give me a meaning to want,

to remove from myself the fear of human beings

the fear of myself

of you

of everything

of runnings away

of losing control

of forgetting

of fakeness

of failure

of wrong

of touch

of love

of hate

of lies

the fear that is the only feeling i know how to feel